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What the Hell

Everyone is a warrior. We all have struggles and trials and tribulations, but life itself is a battle. If you are still on this side of the grass, then you are still in the fight. Our intent is to give you some extra arrows in your quiver and to mend your shield, so your life, your body and your mind are more and more in the ‘win’ column.

We have made it to mid life, and now we are pausing to both look back and forward to the other side of our experience. We have learned a lot so far, and we continue to learn. This site is about sharing, and also giving you some hard-earned bits of information that will make your life better. Hopefully much better. We have reached a point in our lives that we want to actively live longer, healthier and more self-fulfilling lives.

Our aim is to become a trusted resource for information helping middle aged men slow down the ravages of time by becoming healthier physically, mentally and emotionally – all with a healthy dose of irreverent humour. Because as any good proctologist will tell you, in the end it’s only a temporary situation.


Michael Cook

Mike (7DaySamurai)

The Roughage – With an MGIS (Management and Information Systems) degree from the University of Calgary and with a very artsy family, Mike is sticky-conservative on the outside and chewy pinko-commie on the inside. Which is to say he is a very business-minded social liberalist. Mike is the Yang of this site. Mike also has the gift of gab and will talk the hind leg off a horse. Literally. I once saw him having a calm, cool lengthy discussion with a very inebriated wino that was trying to convince Mike that he had just been bitten by Mike’s dog. Despite being drunk, the wino soon realized what he was up against with Mike’s logical discourse, and became very irritated and animated. He raised his voice and began flailing his arms around, at which point Mike’s dog bit the wino.

The Main Dish – If you think of Pink Floyd, hockey and a short stack of site maps and strategy docs with an overheated laptop, this is ‘outside Mike’. Mike is ‘soft core’ paleo, which means he winces noticeably when his wife feeds their three girls Saturday morning pancakes. Mike has enjoyed practicing Wing Chun Kung Fu for most of his life, and is a big proponent of Mark Lauren’s ‘You Are Your Own Gym’

Après –  He is married to an ex-ballerina with three beautiful and well-adjusted daughters. Mike recently asked his daughters if they were prepared to change his diaper for him when he got older, and without skipping a beat the middle child said “I think I’ll earn enough money to pay someone to do that”. Mike is determined to make it to a happy and healthy 100 years old. He recently stopped the habit of yakking on the phone while he was driving. So things are looking up already.

Curt Heitmann


The Roughage – Curt has a BA in Philosophy, and works in Customer Service. So yes, there is gainful employment for humanities majors. Mike is 99.9% sure that Curt is heterosexual, which irritates Curt endlessly, since Mike will not commit to 100%. Which, of course, is why Mike maintains this line. Curt is the Yin to Mike’s Yang.

The Main Dish – Curt is all about walking, yoga, whole foods and retro tunes. It fascinates Curt that more people don’t get how amazing the Flock of Seagulls were. Curt dropped 65 pounds last year on a high protein diet, and has been devouring health books, documentaries and health mantras ever since.

Après –  Curt and Mike have been best friends for over 25 years, and share a ‘Mutually Assured Destruction’ relationship with respect to what they know about each other. For example, Curt could tell you some saucy tales involving Mike, various power tools and some farm animals.